Malditang Ket

It all started last Sunday while JS, Alfred and I (yes, i was an MH) were walking to SC. They accompanied me to pick up the the recopied graduation photos at Florofoto. Anyway, we were talking about "malditang diwata", and what gift would be appropriate for her, as Alfred was quite at a loss on his gift for her. JS eventually said, "Buti na lang samin ka nagtanong, perfect sa mga malditang tulad namin." and I was like, "no way! I'm not maldita". well, binawi ko rin later, and I said, "oo nga, maldita nga ako," while thinking of that primadonna girl I so love making "bara".

The kind of people I hate the most (or perhaps dislike, for hate is quite a strong term) are primadonnas. Those who are so pa-importante of themselves and so mahilig mag-inarte without having the "k" to do so. And _____ is one of those people. My eyebrow really rises to the highest level everytime na nagiinarte siya. Like hallerrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!! And, yes, this is bad but I admit it, I enjoy making "bara" her. I love seeing her op'd and po'd. I derive satisfaction in the way she looks longingly at ______, the guy she obviously so adores, while the guy pasimple distances himself from her.

Next in line are those who just cannot keep their mouths shut. The game "message relay" might be funny and amusing, especially when stories become so far out from the original story. But when it happens in real life, it just hurts and crumples different lives, and I had to suffer the consequences twice. I just find it hard to believe that the persons you trusted most are capable of "betraying" you. I know I'm at fault too, I admit that and I'm really sorry for that. But I didn't expect you (yes, I'm sure you know who you are), of all people, to share our secret with the person concerned within, what?, 3 hours! and very much out of context, too. I wasn't able to correct what you've done, it already had its domino effect, until the person I love the most had come to hate me for all the lies that had circulated. Great, just great...

I know that i should learn to love those who are hard to love. And really, I'm trying hard to do so. (JS, maniwala ka!) after all, didn't the Lord send His only Son for all of us because of His great love? If i seek to be like Jesus, then why can't I love the unlovable? But how can you forgive someone who ruined your dreams? How can you forgive someone who doesn't ask for forgiveness in the first place? And to top it all, how could I dare ask forgiveness when even I cannot forgive others?

I know... I'm trying, I really am...